1 Peter 3:3-4

In the first two sections of Peter’s first letter in the New Testament, he tells his readers not to get caught up in politics. Even though Christians were a persecuted minority living on the fringes of an unjust society, Peter didn’t want them to revolt. He wanted them to trust God with the big picture and focus on living like Jesus. He transitions into what that looks like in the third section of the letter:

Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. 

- 1 Peter 3:3-4 

Peter is talking to wives in this passage, but the underlying point applies to all Christians, regardless of gender. We all know we shouldn’t judge people by their appearance, yet we all do it. There’s no privilege like beauty privilege. Beautiful people get the benefit of the doubt in every aspect of life. People are just more willing to cut them slack.

The stories of Saul and David in the Old Testament illustrate the difference between external and internal beauty. The Jewish people ask God for a king, and He gives them someone who looks the part:

Kish had a son named Saul, as handsome a young man as could be found anywhere in Israel, and he was a head taller than anyone else.  

- 1 Samuel 9:2 

Tall, dark, and handsome is what we want in leaders. In a widely replicated study, people picked the winner in a political race almost 70 percent of the time just by looking at a picture of each candidate. They didn’t need to know anything else: not their names, beliefs, or even the countries they were from. More often that not, voters just go with the person who looks the best.

David would never have won a political campaign against Saul. He was the youngest of eight sons, and he spent most of his time herding sheep. He was barely part of the family. When the prophet Samuel visits his father Jessie to anoint one of his sons as the future king of Israel, no one even bothers to tell David. Samuel goes through all seven of his older brothers, all of whom are bigger and stronger than David. God doesn’t choose any of them. Samuel, who had previously anointed Saul, sees one brother and thinks he must be the one:

But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”  

- 1 Samuel 16:7 

Saul, not David, should have fought Goliath. Saul was “a head taller than anyone else in Israel.” He was at least in the same weight class as the Philistine giant. But while David wasn’t nearly as big, his faith was much stronger. He knew Goliath’s size didn’t actually matter. All he needed was a slingshot and faith. It was like the ending of A New Hope, when Luke Skywalker turns off the targeting machine and trusts The Force to aim the missiles that destroy the Death Star. That is the type of faith that God wants in a king.



The Jewish people couldn’t see any of that. They couldn’t look inside David’s soul. All they could see was a scrawny teenager who looked ridiculous in Saul’s armor. Humans can only see with our eyes. There is no one like Professor X from the X-Men in real life. We can’t read each other’s minds. None of us can know anyone, not even our closest friends and family members, as well as God does. Humans judge appearance. God judges the heart.

That’s what Peter is getting at in this passage. Human judgment isn’t as important as divine judgment. So instead of focusing on your outward appearances and how you appear to other people, worry more about your heart and how you appear to God. The former is all for nothing, anyways. It doesn’t last. No one stays young forever, and no one is beautiful in their old age.

Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.

- Proverbs 31:30 

Building your identity on how you appear to other people is throwing away good money after bad. It’s a never ending pit that has no bottom. That’s especially true in the era of social media, where a persona that takes years to build can be thrown away in a moment. It’s all just a front. None of it means anything. Saul seemed like the baddest dude in Israel, but he was really a coward at heart. 

American society is built entirely on image and superficial qualities. We look to actors for wisdom when their job is pretending to be something they are not. John Wayne was a war hero in movies and a draft dodger in real life. It’s the same with the news. We are informed about the world by people whose only job requirement is projecting a good image of themselves on a TV screen. Most don’t know anything beyond what is on their cue cards. These are not people we should admire or listen too.

Photo: Andrew Dallos

We can fool each other, but we can’t fool God. Humans see what we do. God sees why we do it. There are a lot of people who put on a big show of helping others because they want to seem like a good person. They aren’t doing it of the kindness of their heart. They just do it for themselves. Jesus warned us about them:

Be careful not to practice your righteousness in front of others to be seen by them. If you do, you will have no reward from your Father in heaven. So when you give to the needy, do not announce it with trumpets, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and on the streets, to be honored by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, so that your giving may be in secret. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you. 

- Matthew 6:1-6 

God doesn’t need us to do anything. Saul was the biggest person in Israel, but God didn’t need him to battle Goliath. If Saul wouldn’t do it, God would find someone who would. It didn’t matter who it was, or how big they were, or whether anyone else thought they had a chance. David had God on his side. And he trusted God to win the battle for him. That's what faith is.

Young writers ask me sometimes for career advice. It’s not complicated. Pray, listen to God, and trust in Him. That’s the only reason I’ve done anything with my life.